Thursday, May 27, 2004

return of the fishboy

I've been away from the interweb for a bit. Actually I spent nearly four days without even checking my email, which was quite a feat really considering that I usually can't go without checking my comments & browsing favourite weblogs at least twice a day.

But I've not had much to say lately that I would want anyone else to hear. And the reading of other people's stuff was giving me a case of the blogstipation guilts. This thing is supposed to be fun for me and it wasn't for a bit there. Think I'm better now but time will tell.

Anyway, I'm back. Not that I have much to say, but that's true to form I guess. That's always been the case really - I didn't start this blog with an idea for it to be a soapbox or even vaguely interesting to anyone else. I'm surprised and chuffed that some people do!



Not much been going down really. Been looking for work. Unsuccessfully so far. Although I've got a job dismantling sculptures in a gallery on Monday. And a temping agency that says they can get me something.

Doing karate which is a source of endless inspiration and frustration. Not to mention soreness. (How's that going for you Bro? You hyped for Natsu Keiko? Frazer looks fantastic - faster & crisper than ever... eek!)

I've been learning my way around Sydney - with mixed results so far. I still get lost when driving, well - miss my turns due to traffic and lanes and much honking and screaming (from people behind me usually - I can't see what they're so worked up about since it all looks ok from where I am...). The public transport is pretty good, except for the buses at rush hour when it's rather nasty. Walking is good - thought not viable for across town transport.

We're off to Melbourne tomorrow. Going to a wedding of one of Sas's relatives and staying for the weekend. The wedding is a Christian one, which hopefully won't be too happy-clappy (no offense Bro, just not my bag you know?), but that's all over with on the Friday so we have Saturday to explore the city. Any suggestions? I've never been there myself.

Anyone who's waiting for an email (or, god forbid, a snail mail)should be aware that I am appalling at writing emails. I am trying to get better but it ain't easy... Frank's explanation hits the nail on the head for me too. (oh and Frank: "whoohoo!" for passing the bar exam, "oh no!" for the disappearance of the moggy, and "whew!" for the happy return of aforementioned feline (nice photos). Yes I haven't been round your place much lately...)

I'll be making it a goal to send at least one email a day. If you're the 'lucky' recipient of the daily mail please don't mock me for the extreme length & ramblingness/terse shortness & zen-like emptiness of the mail (could be either). Be thankful you got anything at all (or delete immediately, whatever).

And for all interested parties I'll be developing the photos of the shearing next week and will make them available online somewhere... Erk. I'm quite enjoying the new hairfree me so far, although a few days in Melbourne chill may make me change my mind.

Right, I've rambled enough.

Afternoon all.

Sunday, May 23, 2004

Saturday, May 15, 2004

my life...

Uncannily apt for my situation, makes me wonder if I'm being watched...

Laid Off: A Day in the Life

words to live by...

Seen on Green Fairy:

Life is NOT a journey to the grave with the goal of arriving safely in a prettily preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways in a shower of gravel and party shards, thoroughly used, utterly exhausted, and loudly proclaiming: "Fuck ME, that was BRILLIANT!"

throat wobbler mangrove (just because)

Just some random thoughts and links for all my fans. I would write more but I haven't really the time today since I've got to go into town and do stuff. Damn stuff. Always taking me away from the interweb...

I've got many things to blog about (that word for instance: blog, ugly yet somehow alluring. Well, to me at least but then I find words fascinating) but I haven't really had the time to sort them out in my head for serious (or frivolous) discussion.

First off and most importantly: Sarah's back! Yay! Knew she couldn't stay away :)

I've just finished reading a couple of John Birmingham books (his new(ish) one Dopeland, and re-reading the first one He Died With a falafel in His Hand) which set me off thinking about my flatting experiences and the weirdos that I've lived with. Counting it up I find I've lived in 15 different houses (counting the three months living in a tent in Blenheim) and with more than 50 people (counting itinerant house truckers, couch dwellers, and tenters). There are definitely some stories there. More on that later...

I must write something on Australian TV as it compares to NZ stuff (generally pretty poorly, and I'm not just being patriotic either). The good (SBS on the whole, Merrick & Rosso, Strictly Dancing), the bad (most of the rest), and the ugly (the League/AFL obsessions...). But at the moment I'm just gobsmacked by the mesmerising awfulness that is the Eurovision Song Contest. Oh. My. God. The commentary on SBS by Des Mangan is hilarious, at least he's not taking it as seriously as the contestants do. I think I finally understand why people watch Popstars/Idol/etc, though it took a show of such transcending shiteness to get me there.

On a very different note, it's the 25th anniversary of Masquerade by Kit Williams. I loved that book as a kid, the magic of it, the beautiful detail in the pictures, and also the puzzle that was the idea behind the whole thing. Never did figure it out but the I was only 10 when I first read it.

I am sooo going to go on this! :D

And finally, sorehead. Samples:

Don't eat deep-fried food. Don't eat blu-tac. Unless you really can't stop yourself.

Following thoughts as they change shape. Turning on all the lights. Writing poems for strangers. The removal of one's own fingernails. Telly on mute. Moon on a stick, then backwards through goo.

He lost a friend once by illustrating his point in a musical disagreement too literally. He whacked her on the side of the head with a Bert Bacharach LP.

Strange and wonderful. Go look.

Right, that's enough for now. I'd better prepare for the day - going to karate this afternoon (eek!) and then to see Salmonella Dub/Cornerstone Roots tonight (yay!). Review of that tomorrow. Possibly.

Wednesday, May 12, 2004

new & improved fishboy! (digital version only)

I got my new computer! Yay! Although acquiring it was not without difficulties. As I shall relate in dreary detail.


I spent most of monday driving around Sydney (incidentally spreading mayhem and confusion in my wake for I'm a somewhat 'erratic' driver, or so I've been told, though not in those words exactly come to think of it. As an aside, isn't the way that Sydney-siders wave with a clenched fist or single extended digit rather quaint? But I digress...):

First returning my new 'puter, what I'd purchased not 2 days ago from that very boutique, because it was no more, snuffed it, had ceased to be, expired and gone to see its maker (quite literally). Even before it began being actually - bloody thing didn't work when plugged in. It was an ex-computer. Beautiful plumage though.

Then, after taking said machine in and being told it would be a couple of days, I returned home (each trip taking 45mins to an hour, including wrong turns and traffic jams) to get a call an hour later informing me that the thing was up and ready to go now.

So I toddled off on my merry way again, doing my best to throw the happy commuters of this city into a fine rage. The music of horns playing happily in my ears, I completed my 2&1/2 hour round trip and then proceeded to spend the next 48 hours footling around getting all geeked up.

Anyway, that's enough for now - I'm sure you can all amuse yourselves in the comments box again. You did so well last time! I'm touched. As several of you have pointed out to me in the past...

Friday, May 07, 2004

you like me, you really like me!

I just noticed that my stat counter has gone well past the 1000 mark. So much for my paying attention... Thank you for your patronage and as Apu Nahasapeemabibbletybob would say: Come again!

Oh and if anyone can tell me how to fix up the hinkiness (word of the week: hinky, use at least 5 times a day) of my web ring links I'd be most appreciative. Any web geeks out there - please help!

recent reading

I've not been doing too much browsing of weblogs of late (because of the extreme shittiness of this machine) but the few that I have looked at have been most amusing.

Sleep Evangelist I discovered through the Slackers web ring (it may surprise you to find that I didn't set it up! Only coz I couldn't be arsed tho...), she has what must be the best first entry for a blog ever:

A pigeon flew into my office and shat all over my desk.

Succinct. Lovely.

Supermodel Personals. Sample ad:

It's so fun when you're pretty and go grocery shopping. You can laugh and make fun of everything, and race the carts the around, and take 100 items to the express lane, and everyone thinks it's cute and endearing instead of obnoxious and stupid.


The Grand Ennui. Disarmingly frank, charmingly forthright and an almost disturbing interest in Bettie Page. Which can only be a good thing! Ahhh Bettie.... Ahem, anyway - sample post:

Either or
1. Blind or deaf.
2. A midget or confined to a wheelchair.
3. A really ugly genius or a really stupid super attractive person.
4. A boy named Sue or a girl named George
5. The problem or the solution.
6. Tap lessons or accordion lessons.
7. Self-deprecating or sarcastic.
8. A guest on Jerry Springer or profiled on America's Most Wanted.
9. An orgasm so intense you almost pass out and you just lay there with your tongue hanging out or a phone call ten minutes before you are supposed to get up in the morning saying work has been cancelled for the day but you'll still get paid.
10. A red headed step child or a one legged man in an ass kicking contest.

Funny stuff. Plus Bettie Page. Did I mention that he likes Bettie Page? Mmmmm...

I added Sarsparilla Vanessa to my blogroll recently. Loving her site, check it out. Although yesterday's post about fish had me having unpleasant 'quarium flashbacks. Olfactory ones at that. You can never forget the smell...

Umm, well that's about it. I'll write more about what I'm doing when I actually *do* something. Or not. I went to karate yesterday and trained with my Sensei who's going for his 4th Dan in a couple of months. I would blog about that but the memories are so horrifying I don't want to go there yet... For instance, the innocuously named "hoppy thing". *Shudder*. Oh god, I have soooo much training to do...

Tuesday, May 04, 2004

happy star wars day

May the fourth be with you.

Hyuck hyuck hyuck.

I know, I know, I'll get me coat...

(thanks to Little Red Boat)

more cobbled together bollocks

This is just a filler. It's just that I haven't posted for a while. I hope no-one has wandered off in the mean time.

Sorry 'bout the lack of bloggage but this computer is soooo crap and slow (I may have mentioned before) I get really fucking annoyed even before I get into Blogger and I can't write anything other than swear words. I went and hung out a load of washing in the time it took to log on and get into my site.

But soon that'll all be over, for tomorrow I go to buy a new machine! A whizz bang one with all the trimmings. Probably won't come with bells on but I'm bloody well going to get some and glue them to it. It's taken a while to decide 'cause I get really finicky about spending more than a couple hundred bucks and needed to suss out the best deal. Think I got there but I've got to say at this point I'll take anything just so as I can throw this shit-heap out the window. Grr.

Anyway - here are a few things that have been languishing in the draft stage. I would flesh them out a bit but can't be arsed today. I'm off to sit in the sun with my book, then going to a movie tonight. Nyah nyah.


No Right Turn has a wonderful turn of phrase in his recent "Act of Madness" post:

Prebble's decision to resign as leader may well be the only thing that saves it from being swallowed up by a resurgent National party. Actually ACT has probably already been swallowed up so its more like they're attempting a desperate heimlich maneuver or sticking their pudgy little capitalist fingers down National's throat to force vomiting in the hope that they will spit ACT back out again

lovely! :)

Alternative TV listings:
17.30 Smallville: Superman The Early Years
Clark’s identity is in crisis when he has to explain
to the Sheriff how he finally got a blowjob off of Lana
and blew the back of her head off. Also, a large amount
of Kryptonite falls from space into Scotland, turning all
the inhabitants into violent, drunk, fried-mars bar eating
arseholes that emigrate down south as soon as they
are old enough and pick fights with the nearest peaceful
stranger after half a pint. It seems the Kryptonite has
caused these colossal cunts to permanently whinge about
how shit England is and how soft the English are, but the
concept of actually fucking off back to their family Rat-den
in Fife has somehow eluded them. Can Clark put a stop
to this Plague? Fingers fucking crossed!

(from The Surrealist)

I'm an eating, crapping and shagging bug! As if you didn't already know...

My Breedster profile

If anyone wants an egg when I (finally) grow up, leave me a comment. Be nice.

Finally, The Quote of the Day:

Jesus said unto them, "And whom do you say that I am?"

They replied,"You are the eschatological manifestation of
the ground of our being, the ontological foundation of the
context of our very selfhood revealed."

And Jesus replied, "What?"